3 weeks to go

So three weeks left in the semester. Sigh, so many things to do. So many things to think about. Two days ago I received another rejection from a company that I interviewed with. I know it's not due to my academics and qualifications. I'm always referred a company by a professor. When I ask if I have a chance at getting the job during the interview, most of the time I hear that I have very good work experience and that my academics are good too. I'm a lot better than most of the other students they've interviewed here, they would say. So why on earth do I get pushed aside when it comes to the final part!? I know it's because of my visa status I just know it. Kalau ada local graduate, they'd rather hire the local grad even if a foreign grad is more qualified. Sakit hati tau.

Some Malaysians would ask, why am I not leaving to go back to my home country. Some people say, dah lupa diri... Malaysia is not good enough. But that's not the case. I'm with my husband. He and I are every bit Malaysian as other Malaysians - maybe even more because when one is outside his or her home country, he/she tends to keep the malay culture that they know as alive as they possibly can. Orang kat Malaysia pulak yang nak jadi westernized. It doesn't matter what the choices in my life have been. I'm just really bummed out that it's not as easy a ride as most people think it is. We're the minority here. We have to work so much harder to prove that we're as qualified or even better than other people here. It's such a challenge. Yes, yes, I'm whining. I really shouldn't.

Anyway, I'm thinking about doing another masters degree while I'm here. By the time habis, rasa-rasanya dah boleh dapat PR. That way I won't have such a disadvantage when competing for jobs. What's another year of studies anyway. As for now, I'll just concentrate on finishing up this masters degree and making sure that I don't slack more than I already am.

No matter how much my plans are not working out, I should still be thankful. Yesterday I saw a sales assistant crying on a customer's shoulder. I overheard her telling the customer that she had just been fired and that she didn't know what to do since it's almost xmas and she has so many bills to pay. She seemed really upset too that she would leave the store that she had learnt to love, her co-workers that had treated her so well and the regular customers that she normally interacted with. I felt so kesian coz there I was feeling sorry for myself that my life wasn't going the way I wanted it to when I really shouldn't coz I have so many security blankets to fall back upon. We could move back with our parents (either one would take us under their wings in a heartbeat if we asked), we could go back to Malaysia where we have so many friends and contacts that could help us get a job and we have the savings account we built together in the event either one of us lost our income. We have our health, we have each other's love and I'm glad my eyes were opened yesterday.

Black Friday

"Black Friday, the day after Thanksgiving in the United States, is historically the busiest retail shopping day of the year. Many consider it the "official" beginning to the Christmas season. Most retailers will open very early and usually provide massive discounts on their products, and offer door buster deals to draw people to their stores"

source: wikipedia

Oh my goodness.... my body clock is so out of whack. It started on Wednesday night when hubby and I were invited to a friend's house. We got home pretty late and I was unable to sleep. I had the worst case of indigestion since I was a child. The pain was so bad that I was actually woken up in the middle of the night with the pain. Times like this I am so grateful for hubby's medical background and his patience. He stayed awake with me and treated me till I felt better. By that time, the sun was starting to rise but we were only going to bed. We slept in till noon.

During the day I felt sort of jet-lagged. Every time I tried to read or do some work, I felt nauseous. We ended up taking a nap in the evening. I wasn't really looking forward to the plans we had made to join in on the annual black friday (see definition above). Hubby was excited to see the many electronics items that were on sale. A kodak 6.1 megapixel camera was selling for $98 from a regular price of $150, and ipod dock was only $28, an LCD tv was selling for only $179 from their retail price of $349.99. The factory outlet where we normally shop was opening at midnight and was having discounts on top of the normal sales too. So we dressed up for the cold and headed to the factory outlet. But 2 miles before the exit to the factory outlet, the freeway was jam-packed with cars!! It took us 30 minutes just to get 5 inches ahead of where we were. Other cars were cutting in front of us and not waiting in line. I had a feeling that there were probably no parking left at the factory outlet and even if we did get to the outlet to shop, all the good deals would've been gone! Sorry as I felt, we had to turn around which was actually harder than we thought it was going to be. The other side of the freeway was worse than the side we were on. But because there was no other way to get back home, we spent an hour an a half in the traffic jam to get back home.

Today I read in the papers that a lot of ppl were walking from the freeway to just go to the outlet while the driver of the car tried to get their cars off the freeway and into the parking lot of the factory outlet. So much for getting a good deal. Poor hubby had to drive all those hours though. He still didn't want to give up and we actually stopped at the local department store that were having a lot of discounted electronics store. The store was opening at 6am and we got to the store's parking lot at 3am. There was one guy sleeping in front of the store so we joined in the line behind him. I was so sleepy and cold. Hubby had to endure my whining and requests for him to keep my warm. While waiting, we leaved through the store catalog to see the stuff that was worth buying:

But it was sooooo wet and cold. The temperature was not that cold really, but there was a really dense fog. And after an hour or so out in the fog, I started feeling like there were beads of water forming on my face and on my nose. I kinda got cranky coz it was cold and wet. I got even more cranky when three women suddenly joined the one man who was in front of us, half an hour before the store was due to open. Hello.... we've been waiting in line for 3 hours in the cold and fog and u just get in front of us like it's your right because one person saved a spot in line for your whole family?! Pissed off ok. Some women behind us made comments like "How much did you pay him to hold your spot in line?" And the lady who just joined the line then quipped back "Oh we're related." As if that justifies her cutting in line front of us. I muttered "Oh yeah, but we've been waiting out here all night while you stayed in the warm van of yours." They gave me dirty looks but didn't say anything. Obviously they knew they were in the wrong. I think if it wasn't for people like them, fights for the limited cheap items wouldn't occur. There wasn't a fight for items inside the store. But just having those ladies cut in line really made me want to get ahead of them for the items that were sold. I didn't care if the ladies got their stuff or not. In fact, when we were all walking towards the electronics section of the store, I heard the woman who cut our line say "If I don't get what I want I'm going to kill all of you." It almost sounded like she was laughing but obviously she meant what she said. Or else, she wouldn't even say it right? Yeah, lady go kill people for things you don't get!

Hubby and I just snaked around the aisles, grabbed the stuff we wanted and left very quickly. Quick and simple. Luckily I'm small and almost invisible. I could really make my way around all these other people and just grab the stuff that I wanted. We left and were happy with our purchase. Other people were still waiting for special electronics that were behind the counter.

Arriving home at 6:30am with our purchases, I thought to myself - how on earth did I get myself involved with the madness of shopping here in the US. I almost feel like I shouldn't even be involved in all the rush for cheap stuff coz I definitely don't need any christmas presents and I'm not buying any chistmas presents for anyone else. I'm feeling so jet lagged coz of the lack of sleep and I so want to just focus on my school work. But it makes hubby so happy that I want to be by his side and get all the stuff we can get our hands on. And I have to admit the part where we rush into the store and get the items we want is exciting. I just wish I didn't need to wait 3 hours in front of the store to get the item though. penat lah.....

For now, I'm just resting at home, nursing the jet lag. Hubby is at work believe it or not and is on call tonight. I just hope he gets some rest and short power naps. Or else he would be up for 36 hours straight. Not good...

Concrete pavement arthritis

That's what I heard a lot of people complaining of having while waiting for the new Nintendo Wii. What on earth is that anyway? Oh, it's the pain you get when your bones are squashed against the cold concrete floor. Its the pain you feel when the cold of the floor seeps into your body even when you have multiple layers of clothing on. It's silly actually.

If you can't tell yet, Yup yup... we actually camped for a night to get our hands on the new game console. The lines for the PS3 were set up days in advance. But the line for the Nintendo Wii began around 12 hours before the launch of the sale. So hubby and I packed some sandwiches, brought two tumblers of hot coffee, some bananas, some chips, a sleeping bag, 3 blankets and homework/paperwork with us to the local store. We settled ourselves behind two groups of boys who had brought foldable chairs which I think was quite a good idea actually. The temperature was around 5°C and dropped to about 2°C by 2am. Since we were lying down on our blankets which were on top of the concrete floor, you could feel the cold seeping in through the many layers and hitting our skin. Brrrr it was cold! I stayed up till about 12am just finishing my homework and chatting with the girl who was next to me in line. The guys at the front of the line had to answer the same questions that the shoppers who were still going in and out of the store were asking.

Shopper1: Are you guys waiting for the PS3?
Guys in line: No, the Wii (pronounced 'we' if you didn't know).
Shopper1: Really? How long have you been here?
Guys in line: 45 minutes.
Shopper1: Oh, (with a disappointed look on his face). Well, that's not long. Good luck!

Shopper2: Oh My GAWD! Are you all sleeping outside the store tonight for some game?
Guys in line: Yeah.
Shopper2: You're crazy!
Guys in line: Well, you're fat.
Shopper2 stomped away but didn't hear the remark.

Shopper3: U boys waiting for the Wii?
Guys in line: Yeah! The WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Shopper3: That's cool. (sees some of the donuts the boys had). Hey can I have one of those?
Guys in line: No man, it's our fuel to sustain us through the night.
Shopper3: laughs while walking away

Guys in front of line: What do you guys think is the number one condiment in the US?
Girl in line: ketchup!
Guy at back of line: mayo!
Guys in front of line: No man! It's mustard. You can eat mustard with anything.
This was followed with 15 minutes of argument about why mustard is better than ketchup

Ahhh yes, so you can see how bored I was with the silly mind flossing discussions that were going on. I was the quiet girl who was doing her homework while everybody else threw out points about why they were nerdier than the other and deserved to be in line.

The rest of the night really wasn't any more interesting than the first 2 hours. The same conversations were repeated over and over (mustard vs ketchup). In the middle of the night I seriously had to use the bathroom. Hubby insisted that I go to the darkness of the bushes and use a bottle to do my business. Wargh no way jose'! I was so not going to do that. And since all of us in line had said that we would be ok with anyone getting out of line for bathroom breaks, I drove over to the 24 hour grocery store across the street and asked if they had a bathroom I could use. Oh thank goodness there was one. Coz if there wasn't one, I was going to drive back home which was 10 minutes away to use my own bathroom. No one said we couldn't leave the line to go back home for the bathroom break. hehehehehehhehe

7 hours to go
Can't believe hubby is asleep. Bloody hell, the girl next to me is still smoking. Wish she would smoke somewhere else.

6 hours to go
Under the covers but wide awake - Hears shrieks of laughter "Oh my god, oh my god, we snuck out of our house!! Eeeeekkkk... ooh, ooh. this is so exciting!". Riiiiggght...

5 hours to
"Hey guys! who has the most annoying ring tone?" asks number 1 in line. Sounds of different types of ring tones start playing. Ok, I'm not going to get any sleep.

4 hours to go
It's getting more quiet. I can actually get some shut eye. Right, dozing off now... aaah..... WTF!!! Where did the ciggie smoke come from? *groan* Pulls sleeping bag over head.

3 hours to go
"Hey everyone's asleep!" says number 1 in line. "C'mon! We're not doing this for me, We're not going this for you. We're doing it for Weeeeeeeeeeeeee". Such lame jokes I tell you. Just shut up and go to bed!

1/2 an hour to go
"Dude, wake up. They're going to hand out the tickets soon". Oh good..... I actually managed to get some shut eye and not get woken up by unnecessary comments and conversation. Hmm.. the smoking girl must be asleep too. Yup, she's asleep alright. Right then, lets' get up and roll up our blankets and sleeping bags and wait out the next half an hour.

The store manager handed our tickets. They had 33 only. I'm not sure if any of the people at the back of the line were disappointed. Imagine spending the night out in the cold only to know that you're going back home empty handed. Anyway, we were number 11 and 12!


Once everyone got their tickets half of the line disappeared to use the bathroom at the grocery store across the street. Hehehehee... funny ok. I didn't have to go coz I made sure I didn't drink anything during the night. Just before the store was going to open, everyone back in line and actually got their systems according to what number you were in line. I thought that was extremely fair. That way the people who actually had to wait longer would get the first pick for games and accessories that were being sold too. Dunno what games number 33 got.

So yeah, here's the system and I don't know yet whether it was worth the wait or not. I kinda feel jet lagged and am happy that it's a Sunday so I can actually go through the day like a zombie. Am sleeping at 9pm today.

So, all 12 hours for this. It better be worth the investment:

PS3 no more?

Oh great, we did not expect that people in this really ulu town where we live would decide to camp out for the PS3 3 days in advance! There we were coming home from school/work, and passing by the electronics store on Wendesday night and there were already 10 tents set up in front of the store. The game system isn't even going to be out until Friday morning. I tell you, Americans are a material-based bunch and everything they do is to get materialistic things or to get more money. The people lining up outside the store are definitely out to get the money. After all, if they can brave the cold and wet weather for two full nights, get the system for $600, sell it for $2000, get money AND they can wait until after new year's to get the system for themselves. Ka-ching in their wallets indeed. But I'm not going to be crazy like them and camp out for two nights. Where on earth do you go to use the toilet? And won't you lose your spot in line if you leave to use the bathroom? tsk...tsk... no way would I do that. I counted the number of people who were already there and it's close to 23. The store only has 26 game systems to give out. Probability of us getting one? eeeeeh.. not very good I think.

Ok, but as much as I'm dissing these people who are out to take advantage of the materialistic ways americans are - I'm feeling so utterly sad that the chance of making at least $1000 is flying away. But at least I can feel that way in the comforts of my own home. hahaa............

Ack

Oh my gawd. Is there really only 4 weeks left of the semester? I cannot believe it. I CANNOT believe it! This semester has really gone by fast! I haven't been keeping track of what 'week' of the semester it is and now the end is finally showing it's face. I'm kind of freaking out coz I still need to get my group project started (yes, started - we're all graduating and we've all been way too lazy), pick a topic for my individual term paper and write the term paper, finish up two case briefs, take 3 exams, go for my job interviews and get my work permit application signed and mailed. I still have to arrange my logistics for my trip back home too as my brother is getting married. And before I get back home I have to finish 2 personal projects that I said I would do. That's going to take so much of my time. But at least I think I can wait until the end of the semester to actually start thinking about it. Right now I just need to buck up and concentrate on my studies to make sure I don't mess up my grades. I will never be able to forgive myself if my CGPA gets pulled down coz I took it easy this semester and didn't work as hard as I should have. *shudder*

Thinking about this outburst makes me miss talking to Sunshine, my best friend. She used to be in OZ and she and I would chat online almost everyday. Even if we didn't chat, she would write me emails to tell me about her day. And I would do the same. But now that she's permanently back in Malaysia I've only heard from her maybe 4 or 5 times. It makes me sad. I know it's hard to get online and spend time chatting when you're in Malaysia. There's so much to do, so many people to see and so many responsibilities to take care of your own, family and relatives. Plus she's due to give birth soon so I'm sure she's busy with preparing for that too. Even if she's not preparing for the birth, she's definitely resting more coz hey, you're carrying so much extra weight right? I wrote about Sunshine in one of my earlier entries. In it I worried about how we would lose touch and stop communicating once she returns to our homeland. Looks like it's coming true. Sometimes I feel like just picking up the phone and talking to her. But there's always not enough time. Maybe I'll call her this weekend. I really do miss our friendship and open communication.

Anyway, I should get back to my work. Lazy diva! Such a lazy diva I am.

Camping out

Hubby has talked me into spending the night outside of the local electornics store. He bought a mini tent (but it's not water proof!), some heating pads (since I have raynaud's disease), and foldable chairs for when we get sick and tired of lying down or standing up in the tent. All this so we can be first (or at least, the first few) in line for the new s0ny game system. He's actually taking a few hours off from work so that we can secure ourselves the top xmas present for this year. And no, we're not planning to keep the toys for ourselves. No, no, hubby's more entreprenuerial than that. He's planning to sell em. We need to raise money to fund our trip to visit our parents and also to have a cushion in our savings for emergency. I don't know whether to feel excited or not. Sure it's going to be fun the first few hours of camping. But after that I think the diva in me will start to crave for the warm and soft bed at home and the comforts of using the bathroom at home. Actually, where on earth are we going to go if we need to use the bathroom? Hooo boy....

I do think however that this will be one of those things we'll look back and laugh upon when we're old and wrinkly. Anyway, why not take advantage of the materialistic ways of the people who live here? If they want to make the season about getting the most expensive toys instead of the r3lig0us aspects of it, so be it. After all we're not in that group of people. Plus we don't have children yet - so we don't have to worry about leaving them at home alone or with a babysitter while we spend the night outside the store. Gotta do it while we're young eh? And just thinking about how much we could possibly make (minimum $500) in profit is making me pretty excited.

You can tell that I'm trying to convince myself that this is a good idea and won't be a waste of time. We'll see what happens right? Maybe I'll even bring a camera and snap a few pictures.

Job Hunt still alive

I just heard from the company I interviewed at, P. I've been called back to the final interview! Yay!! I'm so thankful that I got through the second round. I kept telling myself that I didn't care if I got through or not but I have to say that I actually did care. I know this now coz when I heard from the recruiter about the callback, I was ecstatic. The next phase is actually a 2-in-1 interview. The first night me and other candidates are having an informal dinner with our potential managers. The next day is the formal interview. I see that the company is putting quite a bit of emphasis on the interaction outside of the work environment too since we have this meet and greet dinner. On top of that, it's all expenses paid! The company's putting us candidates up in a hotel and paying for transportation (yes, flights from outside the area included). I just hate the fact that I'll have to alone at the hotel though. I think getting prepared in the comforts of my own home would've been a better choice for me. That way hubby can calm my nerves and make sure that my suit isn't crooked or that I have a bit of my shirt tucked into my panties or something. And I cannot imagine getting a good night's rest for an interview the next day in a bed that is so unfamiliar to me. Dahlah sorang2 eeeee... takut.

Anyway hubby is happy for me that I'm going through the next round, but I don't think he likes the idea of me sleeping at a hotel for the interview. I bet you thoughts of me having fun and interacting with the people I will be meeting at the interview event is disturbing him quite a bit. I can be naughty when I want to. muahahaaa... Its good to have these reminders once a while that he has to appreciate me a bit.

Oh boy, it feels like the room is spinning. I think I've had too much coffee. I'm going to go detox myself.

Aliens

No, not the outerspace kind. The kind that are non i*m*grants in the US. Why on earth do they have to use that term anyway? Isn't "foriegn" enough? Everytime I have to check off a box to mark that I'm an 'alien' I get so peeved. Even my professors and supervisors crack up at the thought that I'm an alien. It sounds so degrading somehow. Like you shouldn't be in the country. Benci ok.

Now getting a job is so hard too. A lot of companies only accept applicants who are citizens or permanent residents. And I'm neither. Sigh. As you can imagine, the job hunt is progresing very slowly. Other than the one interview I attended two weeks ago, I haven't received any calls from any other company to come in for an interview. It's very disheartening. Yesterday I overheard one really upbeat girl telling her professor that she aleady has a job offer. It kind of annoyed me eventhough we weren't competitors. I wasn't annoyed that she got the job. It was more of the fact that she went on and on about how she felt sorry for her classmates that didn't get a job offer yet. The way she said it did not sound like she was sorry at all. It sounded more like she was proud that she secured an offer while her classmates were all grovelling around to get a job. I didn't have to try hard to hear her every word either. She was basically shouting it out so that everyone within earshot could hear every single word. What a snob.

Another thing I found disturbing is the fact that more and more talkshows, magazines and tv programs are promoting the fact that if you aren't beautiful, you cannot succeed. There was an experiement with a pair of gorgeous looking twins. They transformed one of the twins to make her look plain and not very stylish while the other remained the beautiful, stylish girl that she is. Basically at the end of it we could really see how one twin was treated compared to the other. I always believed deep down inside that people take more interest in someone who is attractive. They also take the time to learn more about you when you've captured their attention through your attractiveness. But I thought people could still be fair when it came to extending job offers or even an offer to attend a particular university. But maybe not in this country. Maybe in this country, where the hollywood stars are treated like royalty, where plastic surgery is the norm, where weight loss is a goal everyobody has, being more beautiful can get you ahead.

Maybe it's true that what's inside counts, but first you need to get someone's attention with your looks to ensure that they take the time to learn how beautiful you are inside too.

What a cruel world.

Dementia

For a while now everytime I call home to talk to my mom she tells me about my grandma's forgetfullness. I think it started some time last year. She would forget simple things like where she kept her handbag or house keys. Then she would forget things like how we had extended an invitation to her to come for a gathering at our place (she would feel hurt because she heard it from someone else and thought that she wasn't invited). And now it's becoming really bad. She's lost the ability to remember names, she can't remember eating or whether she cooked or not, she would think that someone else's handbag was hers or her handbag is someone else's and she won't remember the people she meets. She'll have a really great conversation with someone, know the person by name, but two hours after the meeting, she'll forget who they were and why she was talking to them so animatedly if she didn't recognize them. What's worse is that she knows her memory is failing her and she is very troubled about it. She keeps asking why she can't remember anything and the doctors keep telling her that it's just old age. If only there's a way to cure it. But I've read somewhat on the topic and it looks like the only that can be done is to slow the progression with medication.

I remember growing up and meeting old grand aunts who were having the same problems as my grandma. But back then I thought that it would never happen to someone in my family. Now that it's happening, I wonder who else in our family would grow to be like that too. What if my mom would be that way when she grows older? I'd feel horrible if I couldn't take care of her since I'm so far away from where she is. Maybe by then hubby and I would have moved back to our home country. But you never know, we're not planning for it that's for sure. The option is always kept open, but only as a last resort if things don't go well for us here. It may sound very selfish, but it's just the way it is for us. I don't need to list the reasons for our choices. Our family members understand why we do it. And that's enough.

Anyway, I do hope my grandma will live long enough to meet and be entertained by the children I hope to have in the future. No one's getting any younger and sometimes in the race to establish and make a name for yourself, you forget the other things in life that matter.

Parties - US style, Malaysian style

I never really realized that there were those types of parties that you get invited to where you don't go to just eat and hang out with friends or acquaintances you know. When I first arrived in LA, hubby and I were invited to a neighbour's house for a 60th birthday party. Orang mat salleh tua, I know - but they also heard about the asian lady that hubby married and they wanted to meet me. Anyway, we went, we mingled, ate very little food and then proceeded to a malay couple's house for a visit as they lived 5 doors away. The first thing the malay couple asked when we told them that we were at a party was "Makan apa?" quickly thinking about the abundance of food that are normally served in malaysian gatherings. Hubby said that it was a mat salleh party so all that was served was chips, pop and alcohol. The malay couple seemed extremely confused. What's a party without food right? But if that's the norm over here, why change it?

Now hubby and I have different styles of parties when we have people over. If the guests are going to be asian - indians, pakistanis, cambodians, indonesians and the like, we cook a lot of food. To us, parties and gatherings are about eating loads of food and having fun. These parties take a lot of preparation. If it's not a pot luck, the preparation and cooking can begin days in advance. And there's the thing about making sure that you have more than enough food. It's better to have more than enough compared to having too little. That way you can pack some to give your guests to take home. Too little is an embarrassment. A mat salleh style party (if it isn't a formal sit down dinner party) takes very little preparation. Just buy some pizza, soda, chips and salsa and everybody's happy. Don't have to spend so much time getting stuff prepared and cooked. No slaving away in front of the stove to ensure that the dishes prepared are slow cooked and tastes superb.

All this talk about food is making me hungry. hehe... I think I shall go have my breakfast now. :)